Ramblings

So I must confess, I'm feeling really overwhelmed lately.

And yet, I keep thinking about getting pregnant again in the summer. How does this make sense? I'm overwhelmed, so add more!

It's my strange sense of logic.

I guess mostly I feel over-extended. Which also doesn't make sense considering that we don't do NEARLY as much now, as we once did. There was a time when we were out of the house, at different events, 4 times a week. And that actually didn't include sports! So now that ALL we do is sports and Girl Scouts, and an occasional playdate, how can I feel like it's TOO much! It's not to much for the children, in fact, I think my oldest would be happy if we went back to 4 days a week of outings, in fact I know she'd like that and not only because she's a complete extrovert, but also because she'd think that would take the pressure off actually getting her work done (more on that later). I've made the decision that I need to step out of my Girl Scout responsibilities next year, and just be involved as a mom, not a leader. This was a hard decision for me, as I truly do love "my girls", they are so much fun, but I don't feel it's fair to not feel like I'm giving them 100%. This year hasn't been nearly as successful in my personal review of my progress. I think the girls are still having a good time, and learning new things, I just feel like it could be so much better. In fact, I know it can be, because it was! It's very frustrating for me. I need to get it together.

And, third and fourth grade is time consuming! LOL Who knew! My younger dd is doing mostly 3rd grade work, with the exceptions of reading and writing, which have been slower to develop. My older is doing 4th grade with the exception of math-oh and the exception that she has made the decision to fail 4th grade. I've made the decision to let her. I decided I'm no longer in the reminder business. I spend ample time planning, and they are old enough to work independently a lot. So, I give them their assignment sheets each day. Things they need help with need to be completed by dinner, but they are free to work on things they can do unassissted until bedtime. Things that aren't completed by bedtime get zero's. My 8 yr old has yet to get a zero, in fact she's well on her way to straight A's! However, her sister...not so much. She had 20 zero's the first week we went to this system (we're about to enter week 3). I'm pretty sure she's going to have to fail before she learns this lesson. She needs to gain personal responsibility for her education, I don't think it's to early or that it will do her any great service to allow this lesson to wait. If she fails (which seriously, I think she will), she will be able to catch up...on her own desire to do so. If she is willing to work extra hard to get back "on grade level", then I will help her with that. If she isn't, then I will accept that decision as well. I'm hoping *crossing fingers EXTRA TIGHT* she will find her own inner motivation. She's not the most responsible being, and sadly I've realized I created this irresponsible, immature being before me! I robbed her of many opportunities to experience the natural consequence of her irresponsibility by constantly being that little voice in her head that said "did you get that done?" "what needs to be done now?" "do you have things you need to finish before class?" By being that voice, I've caused her true voice to grow silent. I'm hoping it will return.

I have a lot of planning to do. I have tons of stuff I want to share, but I haven't made blogging a priority yet. I'd really truly like to. I enjoy it immensely. I need to carve out a time once a week at least to get this done! It's not that I don't have the time...especially with the new laptop, it's that it hasn't been high on my priority list. Which would be fine, if I were spending that available computer time doing something important or worthwhile...but it's nothing that noble.

I want to share one quick thing about our school work, then I'm going to go and get on that planning, and cleaning my home, and going to ULTRA FUN things with my kids this weekend (We're seeing High School Musical 2-stage tour this afternoon, and the Hannah Montana 3-d digital movie tomorrow!!!). I will really try to blog more next week!

We did our first "research project" this month. We completed it with oral presentations this Wed. And, while it became apparent to me that I need to teach my kids how to take notes....after years of saying "complete sentences" they don't get it! It did go very well. They researched Coretta Scott King, and Harriet Tubman. They did internet research, and book research at the library. They collected the info then presented it orally (which wasn't the original plan...but was what our assignment morphed into). They both did a VERY good job, and I was very proud of them!

Now, I'm out.