Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Wordy Wednesday: Mommy Wars

Yesterday, there was a discussion amongst my 'birth board' about a cartoon that was posted by a homeschooler.  It essentially slammed public school kids saying that the homeschooled kids would need to use simpler words, etc to be able to socialize with their public school counterparts.  Some people saw the side where it was basically the Original Poster (OP) pointing out that socialization of homeschoolers (or lack thereof is a stereotype) but most saw it as the OP doing the exact same thing (stereotyping publicly schooled kids.)

First, my reaction was that it was completely hypocritical of the OP.  Second, if she feels like she needs to justify her choice...that is HER issue.  I've been at this a long time (14 years....when I have to make statements like that I feel ancient.)  And, truly, never once remember feeling like I needed to justify my choice.  I'm sure it helps that I've surrounded myself with people who are supportive of diversity, and freedom of choice, and individuality.  So maybe those who need to defend their choices should look at who they are choosing to spend time with a little more closely.  Friends shouldn't make you feel like you need to defend your choice.  Friends shouldn't make you feel like you need to go to war.

This is just another in the LONG list of stupid shit we (moms) want to war about.  It starts before we even give birth.  You shouldn't drink soda.  You shouldn't eat lunch meat, or canned tuna.  You shouldn't use bumpers in your crib.  You shouldn't have pain meds when you deliver.  You shouldn't give birth in a hospital/birth center/home.  You shouldn't bottle feed.  You shouldn't use pacis.  You shouldn't go back to work/stay home.  You shouldn't....fill in the blank with just about ANY parenting CHOICE and you have the basis of a Mommy War.

Stop.  It.

Trust the people who you know, befriend, are related to, and care about to do what THEY feel is best for THEIR children.  If you don't trust their judgement, you probably shouldn't be their friend.  And, if you feel like they are doing it wrong...walk away.  Quietly, and calmly.  Walk.  Away.

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