Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Wordy Wednesday: YES!

"It’s hard to overestimate the power of Yes—it is a medicine that uplifts and frees our spirit."  a quote from: The Practice of Saying Yes

I'm very "in" to YES right now.  For one thing, in the last year, my life has become amazing LARGELY because of saying YES.  And being HONEST.  Like, RAW honest.  Things that I knew would be painful to say, painful to hear, and possibly blow up in my face.  But I said yes anyway.  I have lived MUCH of my life making my decisions based on fear.  I'm afraid that I might get hurt.  I'm afraid I might fail.  I'm afraid I might not get what I want.  I'm afraid.  I decided I was just done making my decisions from that place.  I don't want to come to the end of my life and look back at all the things I 'wish' I had done.  It's terrifying.  And gratifying.

I have tried to be a positive parent (with the second set of children.  I was younger and dumber, much less happy and not at all the same person as when I had the first set.   I have guilt about this.  I feel like they got slighted.)  And, I can see the positive outcome of that.  Instead of "Don't touch that."  I say "Let's leave that alone."  It's a small change of phrasing, but I think it gives the kids less of a feeling of being controlled, and I can feel a difference in myself.  I'm not perfect, and sometimes, I can feel the negative sneaking in.  I have to manually reset my brain and remind myself to rephrase.  And we are all happier.  It's simple, right?  Give it a try.

Last week, a friend of mine lost a child.  A happy, healthy four year old girl.  I have been heartbroken, and I cannot begin to imagine the pain.  From pain, comes growth.  It has cemented, for me, even MORE the power of YES.  Life can be gone in a split second.  Forever changed.  A large group of my friends are all being struck with this same notion.  "Can I have ice cream?"   YES!  "Can we read ONE more book?"  YES!  "Can you rub my back/belly for a minute?"  YES!  "Can we have a family movie night?"  YES!  "Can we just snuggle for a few minutes?"  YES!   Because we have all been slapped in the face with the reality that even our LITTLE children can be very suddenly, heartbreakingly GONE.

I feel like often our 'knee jerk' reaction is "No."  When in reality, there is no REAL reason to say no.  If we give it a three second thought window, we would realize there is no reason to say no.  I am guilty of the knee-jerk no.  But I am also the type of person that will think about it and then say "You know, there is no reason we can't do that.  I change my mind.  YES!"

I'm encouraging all of you to change at least one knee-jerk no, to a resounding YES today.  Find a moment and just allow yourself to BE IN IT.  Enjoy it.  Cherish it.  

Tomorrow is NOT guaranteed.
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